A first

Yesterday was planned out well. I'd go in early in the morning (never my first choice on a Wednesday, my "day off"), do a quick colonoscopy for a friend, go to the office and do "admin work", go home at noon and be available for the heating people to give my furnace an overhaul, then spend the rest of the afternoon on a local bike trail.

I would never complain about anybody being late for anything, so I simply note that the furnace person didn't show up until around 3, and took for ever doing whatever it is that those folks do. By the time he was done, it was clear that there would not be time enough to hit the trail.

I begged my son to give me some remedial wheelie instruction in our backyard. No sooner did we start to ride around than we were joined by six kids ranging from 8 to 12 years old, all on their cute little BMX bikes. I sensed a Lord of The Flies moment.

"Little dudes and future malchicks", I announced, "Let us form a bicycle gang and ride around the neighborhood. We shall threaten to beat people up unless they give us money or Gummi Bears or whatever floats your little boats."

"Cool!" they said.

"And I shall be your leader."

Next thing I was on my back, looking up at six hostile little kids. "How much is worth to you, Pops, for us not to leave tread marks on your face?"

After settling my account I had the further indignity of watching these kids fly off the backyard ramp we had constructed, even as I was unable to lift my front tire more than one inch off the ground.

Of course these kids have been riding for years and I've only been riding for four months, I reasoned. Maybe I should just do real basic stuff like they might do and see what happens. I started bouncing up and down on my bike in as exaggerated a motion as I could muster.

And then it happened. My entire bike left the ground and both wheels were at least a foot off the ground. Well, at least six inches. I had definitely completely left the ground. I had performed my very first bunny hop.

One of the little kids saw it. "Cool!" he said. "How did you do that?"

"Give me my Gummi Bears back and I might just show you," I said. The rest of the evening was spend in a state of pure bliss.

I just wish my knees didn't hurt so badly today.